Alexander Fleming discovered pandas really fat raccoons

Alexander Fleming discovered that pandas are really just fat raccoons but the scientific establishment is suppressing it because it would destroy the 'theory' of evolution. He was a member of aliens from Mars so they knew he would keep quiet. People who like pineapple on pizza are trying to get evidence to prove it. You won't believe how deep the rabbit hole goes. Alexander Fleming wrote a will, and if you Google for the pineapple-lovers there's loads of info.

This web page produces random false conspiracy theories solely for the purpose of entertainment. The above contents are likely to be fake, fraudlent, nonsensical, and untruthful. If you find that the produced conspiracy theory is true, please report it as a bug.

This web page is based on the Perl library Acme::ConspiracyTheory::Random by Toby Inkster.